The Good, the Bad, and the Grace that covers both...

It's funny. When you have a lot of time to yourself, you start to remember things. You remember old friends and the old times spent with them. Then you hope that they are remembering you too. Sometimes, I get lonely. But then I remember, He hasn't forgotten me and even though I feel lonely or incomplete sometimes, His grace will always be enough. It's not just any kind of grace, it's God's grace that sees me through.

"So remember your people, remember your children, remember your promise Oh! God.
Your grace is enough. Your grace is enough. Your grace is enough for me."


Sometimes I feel like an imposter around other christians. There is a part of me that believes that I'm constantly behind everyone else. I feel like I use God as an "in" sometimes rather than my God and King. I dismiss Him constantly yet call Him my Lord as if He means something to me. I think, yes, He's something else! Something incredibly different and captivating. So tasteful and sweet! Only, i think deep down I try to be Him, at least for myself, so that I don't feel bad if I mess up. And in this race inside myself of who's God and who isn't, I suddenly get so wrapped up in myself that I forget what God is like and only taste the bitter taste of me. So, i guess I've come to the conclusion that God is a good guy.

"You said, 'Let there be!' and there was... all that we see... you made all things well."



You know... snow is very cold. I am still recooperating from a frostbite incident. My toes are very sad right now. There is not a single feeling like the desperate feeling of the cold. It seems as if you can not escape it no matter what. I guess I feel like sin has the same effect. It is like it bites you at your weakest parts and then devours you slowly, leaving a desperate, lonely, and rotting corpse. I know God is watchin my back and all, but sometimes, it seems like he's playin hide n' seek as we walk along, like a child making circles around his father saying, "where did i go?!" Then, in my deliverance, I realize that I am the child and my Father is gracious. Remarkably, doesn't get tired of my games. He looks at me and says, "My sweet child, your going to get tired doing that." Foolishly, I never listen and to no suprise, He is right. I finally loose my strength and I fall to the ground. He looks down with his beautiful, disiplining eyes and scoops me up. Shaking his head. I think, "He knows I'll never learn. I know...I told you so."

He says, "I miss you."



"Great is your faithfulness Oh God. You wrestle with the sinner's heart. You lead us by still waters, into mercy. And nothing can keep us apart."

"Great is your love and justice God. You use the weak to lead the strong. You lead us in the song of your salvation. And all your people sing along."